Today I want to honor my colleague-partner-client, Sara Frohlich, who recently joined the New Mom Club with the birth of her son, Henry. Sara, this message is dedicated you, and all Newborn Moms:
You have crossed into an unknown land, one that you’ve heard spoken of, but have never before entered. Now that you’ve arrived, it may be a much nicer terrain than you imagined, but it may also be a surprisingly dark and scary place. You may find breastfeeding difficult. You may not instantly “bond” with your baby. You may cry more than your baby does. You may wonder whose idea this was, or feel angry and helpless and alone. You may feel totally in control one minute, and then completely out of control the next. You may stare at your baby for hours and forget to brush your teeth. You may berate yourself for all the aforementioned things, especially considering millions of women do this every day. How can this possibly be so hard?
Now, I want you to hear this loud and clear: Every new mom feels these things. Every new mom struggles. Every new mom wonders if they’re doing it right; if they’re good enough for this job. Every new mom feels guilt, and fear and doubt. Every new mom cries. Every new mom wonders why other moms look more “together” than they do. Every new mom is sleep deprived, and it’s a bitch. Especially when you hit that two week mark and you’re so tired it feels like a bottomless pit.
The good news is that the coming days and weeks and months are all revolving PHASES. It will get easier, and you will sleep again, I promise. If you can make it to 6 weeks, you can do anything. Meanwhile, let people help you. Accept food from strangers, let your friend do your laundry, and if you need anything at all, I’m here!
Hi, I’m Natalie, founder of Mommywise. I’m a Brooklyn mom of two (now) teenagers, PPD survivor, still humbled by the early years of parenting. I started this blog in 2004 as a way to help other parents who felt as dark and lonely as I felt to feel less shame, normalize the feelings of not loving parenthood, and raise awareness about postpartum mood disorders. I’m passionately committed to helping new parents feel more joy, offering sustainable employment for women and mothers, and contributing to positive change in the world.