Maybe you’ve never felt this, or maybe you simply can’t admit it to yourself. But have you ever looked around your home—surrounded by diapers and strollers and sippy cups—and felt like you were trapped in a bad film?Have you ever woken up and thought (while your child is endlessly whining and demanding your undivided attention), My God! What have I done? I have. Many times. My childless girlfriend casually said one day, “Oh you probably can’t even remember what it was like before kids…” Um, no, not exactly, I thought. I honestly DO remember life without kids, and frankly, I miss it sometimes. I miss sleeping in and the Sunday Times and spontaneous adventures and a life without constant interruptions! Don’t get me wrong. I love being a mom and I wouldn’t trade my kids or life for anything else. But if I’m honest with myself, being a parent is a lot of undocumented, hard work, with very low ROI (return on investment), and it’s not glamorous. Not at all. My solution? Have a life of your own outside your family (I’m literally writing from a hammock on a Mexican island with aforementioned childless friend). It will give you the opportunity to miss your kids, and be fully present when you return. So go ahead, leave your family every once in a while! I promise it will be worth every moment you are away, and your family CAN survive for a few days without you.
Hi, I’m Natalie, founder of Mommywise. I’m a Brooklyn mom of two (now) teenagers, PPD survivor, still humbled by the early years of parenting. I started this blog in 2004 as a way to help other parents who felt as dark and lonely as I felt to feel less shame, normalize the feelings of not loving parenthood, and raise awareness about postpartum mood disorders. I’m passionately committed to helping new parents feel more joy, offering sustainable employment for women and mothers, and contributing to positive change in the world.